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TESTIMONIES
The following is just a sampling of some actual cases involving actual people in situations where
"authority gone wild" has been manifested.
Do you have a short story to be added to this section? You can submit it to us at: webmaster@wickedshepherds.com
I lost my wife and grown children because they were taught that the leadership superseded the authority of the husband and father. Leadership of the “larger church family” took precedence over the leadership of the nuclear family, completely contrary to God’s Word! Interesting thing is how women so easily fall in line with this type of thinking. And, of course, the children tend to follow their mothers, especially if their mothers receive the complete support and encouragement of the church leadership.
It was a very difficult thing for me to experience the complete alienation of my wife’s and children’s affection. It was even harder when she was spirited away and hid from me and no amount of pleading for her return produced sympathetic results among those who took her from our marriage. They simply did not consider themselves as home-wreckers and marriage-destroyers. Somehow they managed to convince themselves they were doing the will of God by destroying what He had brought together. No matter how hard one tries, you cannot convince them otherwise.
More than my son was lost to this group. By the time the group leadership got through with me, I had lost my wife, six children, and eight grandchildren. I have not seen them one time in the past five years. I cannot get anywhere near them, so convinced are they by group leadership that to love me is to shun me like a dead man until I come to the leadership and take the knee, submitting entirely to them.
This, of course, will never happen. My hope is that one day my family will come to their senses and leave the group. In the mean time, I have gone on with my life and with a new wife who loves God and our Lord Jesus Christ and who is a tremendous help to me in the things I do and in my love for Jesus Christ. Rich
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Let me tell you about my experience at a meeting and how the Lord healed from the pain and damage which that meeting inflicted upon me.
Now, one goes to a meeting with their pastors with the expectation that issues will be discussed in a gracious and Biblically-scrupulous manner; that no one would jump to conclusions, but carefully listen to all facets of a matter before deciding how to best deal with a matter. This was not the case with my meeting (at my particular "church") with pastors named Al Martin, Frank Barker and some other elders. Without going into details, one of the elders had received some hearsay from a lady at church about me that was simply not true. The pastor named Al Martin said, (and I quote) "the Bible says that we are supposed to take some one along and talk to you privately but we'll dismiss with that, and just take the matter to the church." I suggested that they talk to my boss at work, since it was a work-related matter. The pastor, Al Martin, refused to go "to the world." Then things which I had privately requested counsel for over the years were brought up by various elders and they threatened to tell the entire church! I was told that I was "not a Christian" and was given the "option" of resigning from the church...which I subsequently, in my naiveté, did. This was, in a nutshell, how the “elders” had decided in advance to handle my increasingly-embarrassing marital situation, rather than expend whatever efforts were necessary to save our marriage.
Fifteen years of respect, loyalty and service to "My Church" had suddenly flown out the study window. I was devastated...and, without going into detail, that meeting effectively ended our marriage.
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One day in his "office" I was being 'called on the carpet' during the time people were "murmuring" against what was going on in T. Martin wanted me to give names and I first refused to do so. I don't remember how but he managed to get me to give a name. After I did he remarked... "I'm glad you told me the name because if you hadn't I was ready to -Lower the Boom- on you"... ??!!.
What in the name of sanity was that supposed to mean? Was he leveling
some sort of a threat against me?... [which I believe he was]. I can
still hear those words ringing in my ears to this day and it was a most
rude wakeup call to me, for which I am thankful to my God. It was from
that moment on I took my place, "on the other side of the line" so to
speak. From then on I began to watch what was going down more carefully, and of course as I did I saw plainly and clearly what was going down. In terms of Abuse, a major item impelled me to leave T; and that was the day "xxxxxxx" stood up and read a letter he wrote, [prompted by
the pastor/elders...] -Against- his own wife! I saw then quite clearly that
what was going down was Rebellion against the Son of God who said...
what God has joined let NO man put asunder. I saw that these men had no clue, or else they just didn't care... what the Bible said. After that incident I grabbed my wife's hand and hit the eject button. The doctrinal issue had already convinced me Martin was all wet. Al Martin is Legalistic law-monger who uses the law to place men under undue burdens which neither he nor the patriarchs could bear. Jim
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When the issue of authority and submission came up with my husband and I, the elders recommendation was also to separate, as my husband was the one questioning the elders authority. At that point we both knew that advice was terribly wrong and anti-biblical so, in due time, by God’s mercy, we jumped ship. That was a long time ago. By God's grace we have experienced biblical love in many other Christian churches and fellowship groups and quickly learned that Reformed Baptists aren't the only Christians with a handle on the Truth. Now at times we question whether Reformed Baptists have a truncated view of God's love, grace and mercy to sinners.
Since leaving "Our Church", we’ve come to see several areas of this mans teaching that are not biblical but have caused destruction and grief along with broken family members and husband and wife brutality and separations. My husband and I are thankful we opted out as soon as we did.
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When the Lord was starting to open my eyes concerning spiritual abuse and unbiblical authoritarianism, I started to share some of these things to my wife. Also, I started to have some different doctrinal positions from what the church had and different views of church policy. Well, what do you know, that lo and behold, the name of our family was next on the list for our “pastoral visitation.” The time and date was settled. At the appointed time, the TBC “elder” comes over. We start to chat about different church issues. He wasn’t in the house for more than 10 minutes when he turns and says to my wife, “…WELL BARB, HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT SEPARATION?” I said, “WHAT! How dare you come into my house and plant that evil, diabolical seed into my wife’s head!” I should have thrown him out right then and there, but I didn’t. Could you imagine that! Separation, and then, of necessity, possible divorce? For what? Because one spouse disagrees with the pastor’s sermon or an issue of church policy? Sadly yes. But thankfully, the Lord rescued me and not too soon afterward, I dragged my wife and family out of that wretched, wretched place. But not too many are “fortunate” as myself.
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Our congregation separated from the mainstream church. When we separated, we were free to obey God's Word and "all that the Lord has commanded, we will do." Other churches came out and joined us along with families and groups wanting us to provide a ministry to them. We came across the role of elders in the church and the need to have discipline in the church and so it was preached to "obey them that have the rule over you and submit to them." The main emphasis being "obey" - "Rule over," - "submit to them." When the first discipline case came up followed by an excommunication, there were a few outcries from the people. It was then preached by the Pastor that we all agreed to follow and obey God's Word and so when it came to discipline of members, we should recognize that this is a necessary part of obedience in following the teaching of Scripture. We should not be complaining if God wants to correct us and lead us and have the "unruly" brother disciplined and put out of the church.
Excommunications came and we all wondered who was next? My heart went out to these excommunicates and I couldn't understand why they wouldn't repent of their sin and come back to us. I would have welcomed them with open arms. I was 32, single and looked around the congregation to see if I could find a wife. I took one girl out a couple of times and felt that she wasn't the one. The next thing I knew was that I was brought before the minister and 2 elders and told how I had terribly upset this girl and created a scandal. I couldn't believe what I was hearing! What did this have to do with them? I was told by the minister that for me to take her hand meant an utter commitment to her. Several meetings were held with me and false statements were made against me. I was so bewildered as to why these men were doing this to me. They finally broke me emotionally and I was then told to go to the girl, throw myself at her feet, tell her that I had come to look for a wife and that I had her in mind. I know this might all sound incredible and unbelievable, but this did happen. I went home from this meeting a broken man thinking this was God's will. After all, weren't these men spiritually minded men led by God's Holy Spirit and they were all of one accord.
I didn't go to work for a few days still in a state of bewilderment and lay on my bed praying and calling out to God. It was suddenly brought to my mind about the false statements made about me and for the first time in weeks, I saw that these men were not led by the Holy Spirit at all. If they were led by the Holy Spirit, they would have recognized truth when I protested against their false statements. They would not have made false statements in the first place. My mind and heart was then bombarded with tokens of God's love for me. "I will never leave thee or forsake thee." "None shall pluck thee out of my hand." I cannot recall a time when I have felt so close to God.
I wrote out a letter of resignation, handed it personally to the minister at his home and 3 weeks later, a letter of excommunication came. I found myself having to begin my life and find new friends in other churches. I contacted other excommunicates and found that they also had been dealt falsely by this church. Eleven years went by and I received word from one of the excommunicates that the church was claiming repentance for its wrong dealings with folk. I was sent printed statements of how they were wanting to seek folk out and put matters right with them. I was contacted, and it seemed as if they were genuine. I genuinely sought reconciliation and expressed my willingness to forgive. I asked for the statements about myself that were read out to the congregation at the time of my excommunication. I was horrified to read further false statements that I was not aware of such as "seeking to cause divisions amongst the brethren and elders." Totally false! When I challenged them on these statements, they remained unrepentant and I also reminded them of their printed statements of wanting to put matters right.
I can only conclude that there overtures toward me were false and I couldn't understand why they had bothered. The answer came from another excommunicate who stated that so many folk had left the church and that they were in financial difficulties and saw this as some sort of judgment from God. So, they reviewed their past case histories of excommunications and tried to get the folk back again…..under their control, of course!
I have kept all the letters of correspondence with this church to prove my case and defend any false statements that are still existing.
I still hold out hope that he and the elders might approach me with a true sorrow, repentance, and truly seek my forgiveness and have it made known to all the folk. I think that would give me closure. On the other hand, this may never happen and I will have to accept this situation. I don't know why this happened to me. God has His reasons. All I know is that I must continually look towards God and trust in Him for His leading and guidance in my life. I don't find it easy putting the past behind me as my experience has left its emotional & spiritual scars. Your website has helped me all the more in my understanding of what is happening in churches today.
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I remember a few years back that there was an issue that I had with a “Pastor” named Greg Nichols. I disagreed with him on a judgment matter that he arrived at in regards to myself and one other person. I wrote him a letter, indicating that he was wrong in his assessment and judgment. A few days later, I receive a phone call from Greg Nichols ordering me to come to the “elders meeting” the following Saturday. I asked him for what purpose. All he said was, “the letter!” Here I am now, all nervous, arriving the following Saturday evening at the “elders meeting”. Present were Greg Nichols, and two other "elders," Frank Barker, and Don Dickson. The main "pastor," Al Martin, was out of town. Frank Barker did most of the talking. He started off lambasting me for writing this letter to Greg Nichols and telling me, “Don’t you know that this is the Lord’s anointed!”
On and on he went about “touching not the Lord’s anointed”. Absolutely nothing of the letter was addressed, only how I “sinned” and needed to repent of my sin of touching the Lord’s anointed was the topic of the meeting. Needless to say, in my immaturity and nervousness, I acknowledged my “sin” and asked for Greg Nichol’s forgiveness and after that, I was dismissed.
When I look back now on that incident, I sometimes scratch my head and say, “how could I have been so foolish and immature to let this happen.”
But I was doing exactly as I was taught: submit to and obey your elders, no matter what. Since that time, I've learned that many of their tactics go against scripture!
In the context where the phrase “touch not the Lord’s anointed” is found, it has absolutely nothing to do with what they said it did. In fact, if you search it through in both the OT and NT, it’s THE PREACHER THAT TROUBLES OR CONFUSES GOD’S SHEEP, WHO IS “TOUCHING THE LORD’S ANOINTED,” not the other way around.
I wonder how many elders/pastors have used David’s words to maintain their own authority even at the expense of the real truth.
It is absurd the lengths to which supposed “learned” men are willing to go to make God's Word fit into their false, blasphemous doctrines.
Thank God that he has opened my eyes to see and gave me the feet to flee from that place and to flee from all of their pompous and demented ideas of what they think Christ’s church is.
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At a business meeting in our church (Trinity), when we were voting for an elder, and at another time for some other “church policy” issue, I remember very vividly how I specifically and deliberately voted “NO” on these issues, just to keep the vote from being “unanimous.” No other reason. At the end of the tally, the pastor named Albert N. Martin comes up to the podium and announces, “it is unanimous.” I must admit though that at this point, I wasn’t surprised at all. To make the announcement, “it is unanimous,” when there is even one vote to the contrary, is to say the least, downright dishonest. And I subsequently learned that the elders always “try to figure out” who the negative vote was, which again, I was not surprised to hear.
At one business meeting, when we were voting for the confirmation of an elder, before the vote was taken, Rev. Al Martin rises up to the podium and starts to browbeat the congregation; frightening them and bullying them into voting a certain way.
Waving his pointed finger to the congregation, he raises his voice and bellows out saying, “IF ANYONE VOTES NO…….IF YOU VOTE NO ON THE ISSUE OF CONFIRMING THIS MAN, YOU ARE VOTING AGAINST THE JUDGMENT OF YOUR ELDERS!!!!!……”
So after that lecture, the vote is taken, and as expected, everyone voted yes, for the tally was unanimous. How could it not be otherwise. Everyone has just been terrified and browbeaten into voting yes. And no one sees a problem with this. And even if they did, they know all too well the consequences that would fall upon them if they would voice a concern. So they keep quiet.
The sad part is this. Once the business meeting concluded, and now comes the time for the closing prayer, Al Martin prays this: “God, we thank you for letting us know Your mind and Your will at this meeting tonight…..and in the final analysis Your voice has been heard and Your will has been done. Not unto us, but unto Thy name be the glory.”
Are the words fake, phony, and fraud too strong in being applied here? Excuse me...........does a cat have a tail?
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Thank you for your article "A Word to the Wives"!!
I was raised in a church where this was taught to me from birth. I left that church about a year and a half ago…..
Sadly, the events you describe in the article are the exact same things that are happening in my family now. Shortly after I left the church, my father did as well. He is attending another church now and is very happy with the message being taught there. Unfortunately, the old church has convinced my mother that my father left the church in sin. This, of course, is not the case. He tried to leave the church respectfully, but the pastors told him that if he left the church, he would forfeit his authority over my mother. He knew this was wrong and could not remain in a place that upheld this principle. Sadly, the church leaders immediately went to my mother and told her that my father was in sin (they lied, or used the "you don't need to know" statement, about why he left the church), telling her that she would be in sin if she left with him!
My mom is still at that "church". They have convinced her and my little brother to move out from my father's house, telling them that his statements about what the Lord showed him in the new church's sermons was really vexing them. It's all such a horrible mess!
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MY name is Terry and I am a survivor of Pastor Al Martin. I'm not even going to say of "T" because a church takes on the flavor and character of its leader. A church is the body of Christ not an inanimate building, and a group of people (the body) will often adopt the attitudes and character of the leader that leads them. If he is leading in a godly way, they will aspire to godliness. If he leads by tyranny, fear, hatefulness...they will either cower into immobility or they will become hateful as well.......
I had lived and revolved in "T" for my entire life. It was my church home. I loved it and frankly, knew nothing else, nor wanted to. I always assumed that PM would be the pastor to marry me and I would raise my family there. I had many, many friends, having been there for so long.....I began to notice that friends would shy away from me and simply not talk to me. This puzzled me but I figured they were just having "off days". One of the men at the church had asked me out on a date. It was our second one and he came to my workplace to pick me up. Enroute to our date he told me that PM had called him in to talk to him. "HUH, that was weird," I thought. What did he say, I wondered. "He told me that you were a slut....oh wait, no, he called me a 'strumpet'; that's an antiquated word for slut!" I was shocked. Why would he call me that? I was a Christian young woman in his church; I had never slept with anyone; I didn't go around throwing my body at the young men.....I was truly surprised........
After questioning my date more, he told me that Martin said that HE HAD BEEN TELLING A LOT OF THE MEN THIS! This was the first time I had ever heard any such thing or that he even thought it.......
I told him that I would go to PM and talk to him about it to see if I could get to the bottom of it. So I called PM and set up an appointment (I still remember their phone number). I showed up the next week for my meeting and he was sitting behind his desk, leaning back in his chair with a casual attitude.
We dispensed with the casual chit chat.... and I proceeded to tell him that I had heard something very distressing. "I've heard that you have been going around telling some of the guys in the church that I am a strumpet, which is a slut??! You have known me for my entire life, why would you say that about me? There is no cause or proof to call me that. It says in the Bible that if you have a charge against someone you should go to them and talk to them, if necessary take witnesses....but, you never came to me, you just went around telling people this thing. I had wondered why friends were suddenly ignoring me. And, if you had such reservations about my character you could have talked to me or even talked to my father who has been a member of this church for over 20 years.....?"
.....To which, he slammed his chair down on all 4 legs, leaned as close to me as his desk would allow and in a threatening posture and with spittle flying from his mouth...he thundered, "WHO ARE YOU TO QUESTION ME?" Silly me, I still thought we could have a reasonable discussion.....
...."Well, I am a Christian young woman in your congregation who has never done anything like that. Why would you not come to me?"
"STOP",……. He was still thundering,...."STOP and repeat after me" (Yes, he forced me to repeat after him)….
"I…Terry…xxxxxx…am…a…slut.” It was the most appalling, terrifyingly abusive conversation I had ever had up to that point. Just re-telling it leaves me a little stunned and breathless. Remember, I was a young woman 30 years younger and He was a big man too. But, the most heartbreaking thing about it was that I couldn't even wrap my mind around how this man, that up until that moment, I had trusted, loved, respected and considered like my dad, would so betray me with vicious, evil, slandering lies that HE HAD BEEN SPREADING AROUND ABOUT ME FOR MONTHS!!!
Later that day, I found out that he had figured out that “my date” had "spilled the beans" and told me what he'd said because I was told that PM “had a meeting” with him where he ripped him apart for telling me. I guess he fully intended to keep spreading these vicious lies about me for as long as he could get away with it. And poor, clueless me, I had no idea at all and would have just continued wondering why friends were refusing to talk to me.
...As an epilogue to the story….. I had numerous meetings after that with PM, the elders, even my dad and combinations thereof....trying to work things out. Frank Barker, one of PM's henchmen, cornered me after church one morning and told me that I had really “hurt Pastor Martin's feelings” and that I should go to him and apologize. Now, I was young, but I was not a fallow fool. I had done absolutely nothing wrong to that man. He had systematically denigrated my reputation, spread lies about me and had intended to continue. He wasn't sorry; he was just sorry that he had been caught in his lies.
I stayed for a while longer and more and more of my friends refused to talk to me....not just the guys, but their but their girlfriends. I was a pariah and eventually I just left. With no fanfare, or letters to the church. I just left…….
Because several things you learned quickly at "T":
1: always agree with PM
2. if and while you were giving him praise he could behave graciously toward you but watch out if he (for whatever reason) changed his opinion of you. It didn't have to be founded in truth, he just had to think it.
3. he and his men would dig up scripture and twist it to their hearts content to keep the people under their control and fear.
4. don't waste your time trying to have logical, Biblical discussions. You would be ostracized and vilified and ultimately thrown out of the church in ignominy. followed by lies and rumors, having lost all of your friends.
5. just leave, just leave
valuable lessons for survival.
I have friends who attended "T" their entire lives that I will forever hold Martin personally responsible for. He taught the Bible but he didn't live it and these kids came to hate church, Martin, religion and God. Because of his evil example and hatefulness, he has made my friends twice the children of Hell. They want nothing to do with God or Christianity and no amount of my coaxing has been able to sway them from their fear and mistrust of God. I can't convince them that God is nothing like Martin! That is a tragedy that reduces me to tears.
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My husband an I got converted in 1996 in Berlin, Germany, in a church of about 2000 members. We had many questions and even flew half way around the world attending different conferences but were always left alone with our questions. It did not take long that we finally realized that we were not welcome asking those questions. So we went to another church; and another; and another. I could not understand why the people in the church were no different from the ones outside. With the issues of total submission to the authority of the pastor, tithing, the jealousy between the churches and so on, I simply could not find all that in the bible. There was something very wrong but we seemed to be the only ones thinking that. In the end we were isolated; told that we would
never get any blessings outside the church and no protection from God.
But by that time however, we had already decided to leave and be our own church; and so my husband and I and some more family members left because of the very issues that you mention on your site! We lost all of our "Christian" friends, but found Jesus on a very personal scale.
We feel connected in the unseen with real body of Christ all over the
world. We pray for the brethren who we don't know and where ever they may be. The church system was established as a means of mind-
controlling the people. The body of Christ is an organism, not a system.
May more and more brothers and sisters in Christ all over the
world come to that truth that will really set them free.
With kind regards from Germany
C.H.
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