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In Everything | Wives, do NOT obey your pastor!
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In  Everything
An article that your local church, your pastor, and all feminists will hate 
but one that will be loved by those who are called according to His grace.

Where is the wise? Where is the scribe? Where are the thinkers of this age? 
Does not God make stupid the wisdom of this world?
1 Corinthians 1:20

At one of the annual Ladies Retreats that was organized by the local church, this is what was taught to all of the ladies in attendance by the visiting pastor from Michigan:  Quote:

“….A wife is to be subject to her husband only domestically; in things relating to the home

“You know….issues like paying the bills, where to go on vacation, what car to buy, whether to have a dog or not, taking out the garbage, etc., etc.  When the Bible speaks of submission to your husband, these are the kinds of things that a wife is to be subject to her husband; things that are only related to the domestic realm.” 

"Remember - there are three sphere’s of government:  Civil, domestic, and church.  And so, ladies, this is what you should say to your husbands:  "You know hubby, there are three spheres of government.  There's the domestic sphere, the civil sphere, and the church sphere.  Only in terms of domestic issues, things that come under the domestic realm, I am to look to you for guidance and to come under your submission.  I am not to come under your guidance and submission in the civil or especially the church sphere.  That is beyond your scope of authority over me, hubby!"

What has just been stated is a loathsome evil and practice that is occurring in many churches across the globe.  But should we be surprised?  How many times in the scriptures have we been warned over, and over, and over again concerning man's ways and traditions; taking heed to what we hear; testing and proving the spirits, etc.  But unfortunately, Truth has once again fallen upon deaf ears.

Few subjects create emotional stirs like that of a professing Christian wife being subject to her husband in everything.  For some of you who are reading this article, the title “In Everything” will bring a response like, “Oh No. Here we go again!”  Yet the scriptures are crystal clear. 

For some women, truly accepting and following this one Bible teaching may very well be the ultimate test of their professed Christian faith in God. 

This subject not only creates emotional stirs but is also greatly misunderstood and greatly perverted by the local church and its leaders, which if you are at all familiar with this site, shouldn't come as a surprise as well.

Yet, like it or not, once again, the Truth needs to be told.  All of God's Word demonstrates that Truth has always been hated by the masses of mankind, but especially by those who belong to a so-called religious system.

The carnal mind, epitomized in the local institutional church and by many of its adherents, cannot be subject to the law of God.  They simply do not like God's way of doing things, but rather prefer, and actually succeed in convincing themselves that their way is actually more acceptable and pleasing to God.

Remember though that "It is the SPIRIT that gives life; the flesh profits nothing!"  

The article that you are about to read is backed by many scriptures and other concrete and explicit examples of false teachings on this subject; false teachings that zero in on the destruction of the husband/wife relationship.  Some I fear will not even believe the things that they are reading.  They will chafe; they will mock; they will not heed the warnings. But this is to be expected.  Such is the power of deception, both to the deceived and the deceiver alike.

If we believe and obey, we walk in the light and we have fellowship with Him because He is the Light.  You can only walk with Him if you are in agreement with Him.  If you disagree with God on any matter, it is YOU who needs correction, because there is no darkness with HIM; no lack of knowledge or wisdom with Him.  As you walk with Him, He teaches, disciplines, corrects, and chastens you, and the blood of Jesus Christ cleanses you from all unrighteousness.

Both to the deceived and the deceiver, as well as unto all them also that love His appearing, may He use this article and through the working of His Spirit, do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think.

Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly are ravening wolves.
Matthew 7:15

“…But even as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives to their own husbands in everything…...DOMESTIC."

Where is the above scripture found?   


Answer:  It is no where to be found!

It is a scripture invented by religious strongmen who want total and absolute control of your life; especially in regards to the marriage institution and the husband/wife relationship.

When a wife succumbs to this false teaching of scripture, (and many do) she can now re-direct and completely alter the focus of headship, authority, and leadership in her life away from her God-ordained husband and hand it over to her false teachers in the church instead.  

Since it is supposedly now only in the domestic realm that a wife is to be subject to her husband, when it comes to situations in "church", and "church policy", and bible teaching, and scripture interpretation, she is told that the husband must take a back seat; he must not interfere with the so-called authority of the church and therefore the wife is supposed to submit to all of her pastors instead. 

If a husband's direction and counsel to his wife is one way, and the pastor speaks something else and his direction and counsel is in another way, the wife is taught that she must now follow the words of her pastor and not the words of her husband.  


Because according to the churches false teaching that has been cleverly set up, the pastor’s counsel and direction trumps the husbands counsel and direction because it is “not in the domestic realm.”

Dear reader, is this the teaching of scripture?  

When God says that a wife is to be subject to her own husband in everything, does God mean in everything….domestically?

In other words, when it falls out of the “domestic realm of the home,” is a wife told by God not to be subject?  Is she (as one typical false teacher says) “not to submit and therefore, go ahead…suffer the frown of your husband rather the frown of God?”

Dear people of God, agnostics, atheists, or anyone else reading this material, do you see why there is a desperate need for a website such as this?

Do you see why there is an “angry tone”  to some of the articles that are presented here?

Do you see why we label these false teachers as poisonous snakes, spiritual monsters, and carnal-minded control freaks!

Nowhere more do wicked shepherds; these rats who thrive in the sewer of unbridled pride and maliciousness; nowhere more do they rear their ugly heads and bear their poisonous fangs in the local institutional church than in this:  destroying husband/wife relationships and the marriage institution, simply because one spouse has begun to question the pastor’s teachings. 

These are men whose mission is self-serving; their eyes always on themselves, and not on God.  These are men who become intoxicated with the lust for power and control.  They stand, not as a lamp that shines unto all, but as a backdrop for the blackness of darkness against which God shines His True Light to give understanding to those who put their trust in Him.

We are indeed living in dangerous times.  Let the truth be known - the marriage institution is under severe attack from within the church.  When those in “positions of leadership” in the church, or anyone else, tampers with someone's marriage, they are treading holy ground!  

With that brief introduction, let us now proceed to see how and why such a situation as described above can even exist today and what can be done about it.  

What does it mean for a wife to be subject to her husband in everything?

Why must a wife to be subject to her husband in everything?
The Wisdom of God

"Every wise woman builds her house: but the foolish plucks it down with her hands."        
Proverbs 14:1  

What kind of a wife are you?

There is no greater role for a woman in this world than being at her husband's side at all times.  There are a number of examples in scripture which shed so much light upon this truth; scriptures that have been at best, just glossed over, or worse, deliberately and willfully twisted by "wicked shepherds" in order to gain their own ends. 

God expects a woman to be subject to her husband in everything because the husband/wife relationship pictures the holy, sweet relationship of Christ and His bride.

To quote one of the old writers on this issue:    

"The wife is to be the figure of the church. Christ loveth to have his spouse keep at home; that is, to be with him in the faith and practice of his things, not ranging and meddling with the things of Satan.  Wives should be about  their own husbands’ business.  It is an unseemly thing to see a woman so much as once in all her lifetime to offer to overtop her husband; she ought in everything to be in subjection to him, and to do all she doth, as having her warrant, license, and authority from him.  And indeed here is her glory, even to be under him, as the church is under Christ: Now ‘she openeth her  mouth with wisdom, and in her tongue is the law of kindness"  (Proverbs 31:26).

Or as one other old writer has so quaintly and aptly said:  

“…a good woman, if she be brought into the marriage state, will be a good wife, and make it her business to please her husband…. and she be willing that he should rule over her.  She makes it her constant business to do him good, and is afraid of doing anything, even through inadvertency, that may turn to his prejudice;  She shows her love to him, not by foolish fondness, but by prudent endearments, accommodating herself to his temper, and not crossing him, but giving him good words, and not bad ones…………nor would she, no, not for the world, willfully do anything that might be a damage to his person, family, estate, or reputation.  And this is her care all the days of her life."

Whenever a woman forsakes her husband to follow the spiritual advice or counsel of another, it will always lead to tragedy; a tragedy that (unless and until the Lord Himself intervenes), will leave its scars for a long time. 

The Bible says, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord," that is, as unto Jesus Christ, and so of course in complete submission.  And again, "Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything" (Eph. 5:22,24).

Not only does this urgent Biblical truth desperately need to be taught once again in many churches, but also these godless, unbiblical teachings of "wicked shepherds"  needs to be exposed today and many need to be warned!  

But now, let’s suppose this.  Let’s suppose a woman feels God is leading her definitely opposite to what her husband has directed.  Who should she obey?  What should she do?  Does the biblical command of wives being subject…in everything still apply, even if the husband requests his wife to "go against her personal convictions from God?"

In Numbers 30:1-16  we read:

Num 30:1   Moses said to the heads of the tribes of Israel: This is what the Lord commands:

Num 30:2   When a man makes a vow to the Lord or takes an oath to obligate himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.

Num 30:3   When a young woman still living in her father's house makes a vow to the Lord or obligates herself by a pledge

Num 30:4   and her father hears about her vow or pledge but says nothing to her, then all her vows and every pledge by which she obligated herself will stand.

Num 30:5   But if her father forbids her when he hears about it, none of her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand; the Lord will release her because her father has forbidden her.

Now notice this next section:

Num 30:6   If she marries after she makes a vow or after her lips utter a rash promise by which she obligates herself

Num 30:7   and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her, then her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand.

Num 30:8   But if her husband forbids her when he hears about it, he nullifies the vow that obligates her or the rash promise by which she obligates herself, and the Lord will release her.

Num 30:9   Any vow or obligation taken by a widow or divorced woman will be binding on her.

Num 30:10   If a woman living with her husband makes a vow or obligates herself by a pledge under oath

Num 30:11   and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her and does not forbid her, then all her vows or the pledges by which she obligated herself will stand.

Num 30:12   But if her husband nullifies them when he hears about them, then none of the vows or pledges that came from her lips will stand. Her husband has nullified them, and the Lord will release her.

Num 30:13   Her husband may confirm or nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself.

Num 30:14   But if her husband says nothing to her about it from day to day, then he confirms all her vows or the pledges binding on her. He confirms them by saying nothing to her when he hears about them.

Num 30:15   If, however, he nullifies them some time after he hears about them, then he is responsible for her guilt.

Num 30:16   These are the regulations the Lord gave Moses concerning relationships between a man and his wife, and between a father and his young daughter still living in his house.

This is an important passage; one that is hardly EVER read, let alone, spoken about in ANY church!

Among other things, this passage teaches two major truths:

 #1)  that a husband is given the right by God to prevent his wife from taking a spiritual step she feels led to take.

 #2)  that if he does, God holds him accountable —He shall bear her iniquity."

Another important and relevant scripture is in 1 Samuel Chapter 1.  

Remember the incident with Hannah and her husband Elkanah? 

Hannah’s vow beginning in 1 Sam 1:1 ff shows how the above principle is worked out.  Hannah promised God that if He would give her a baby boy, she would give him back to Him. 

But it was not until Elkanah had approved the vow (Do that which is good in your eyes.  Remain until you wean him...) that she was able to keep her vow.

It’s important to see that this passage is talking about a definite act of worship, or dedication, which a woman wants to make.  It concerns her doing a positive good.  It does not mention anything about a husband’s requiring a wife to break one of God’s commands.  Why not?

Because Hannah did not break any command.  Her husband has been given the right by God to nullify it and she is to obey her husband.  

And that is the important biblical principle.

In the New Testament, there is the situation with Timothy and his mother. 

Timothy’s mother Eunice was a believing Jewess, married to an unsaved Gentile (Acts 16:1).  Now God commanded that every Jewish baby boy be circumcised.  If he were not, the covenant would be broken and that soul cut off from his people.  Nevertheless, Timothy was not circumcised.  Why?  Because his father did not permit it.  Yet God honored the faith of Eunice, and greatly used her son Timothy. 

The law of being subject to her husband superseded the law of circumcision.  God held the father, not the mother accountable.

A common request which a woman “deems necessary” to break is the one from a husband that will not allow her to attend church services, or to give “offerings,”  whether it be from a “Christian” husband or not.

It is right to go to church.  It is right to give to God.  Or is it? 

The oft quoted scripture that is given is Hebrews 10:25 which says, “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together.”

(See an explanation of Hebrews 10:25 here:  "Forsake Not The Assembling")

Just by way of an aside, it is not what many teachers of the law says it means and what many ”wicked shepherds" use as a hammer to bring condemnation to one who does not attend their staged weekly gathering.  

It does not say it is a sin if a woman is not in church Sunday morning, evening, and Wednesday night. 

The word “church” isn’t even in the passage

When you read the verses preceding this one, it becomes apparent that the Spirit of God is not trying to get us to be more faithful to attend church services!

In fact, when this was written, Christians did not even have "church services" (or church buildings, for that matter).

Be that as it may, obviously there are situations when a woman cannot assemble with Christians: sick children, no way to get there, out of town and so on.  God is not going to punish a woman who misses a so-called “church service” when it was humanly impossible for her to be there. 

Neither will He punish a woman who misses the “church service” because her husband instructs her not to go

Of course when there are those times when she cannot gather as when sick, etc…she can fill in that gap as best as she can.  Scripture reading and prayer life will get careful attention.  The woman is held accountable for that.  It is important that one not use the excuse of not being able to assemble for living a worldly life. 

God will hold the husband responsible if a wife cannot attend “her church service” because of his direction.

Listen!  Unless there is submission all the time, there is no submission any of the time.  If you choose when to follow your husbands direction, then you are not really following him at all.  You are simply doing your own will, (or the will of other people) and sometimes it happens to coincide with his wishes.

As one Christian woman has said, 

“It takes more strength for a woman to submit to a husband believing his decision is wrong, than it does to bully, belittle or refuse to submit. But God's reward for such character and strength (which I'm here to tell you takes the spirit of Christ living in you to successfully perform) is immeasurable.”
1 Peter Chapter 3

“..As Sarah obeyed Abraham…”
1 Peter 3:6

Another very potent illustration of the degree of this obedience is given in 1 Peter 3:6: “As Sarah obeyed Abraham.”  

Remember what it says?  Here it is: 
1 Peter 3:1 Likewise, wives, submitting to your own husbands, that even if any disobey the word, through the behavior 
of the wives, they will without a word be won, 
3:2 observing your pure behavior in fear.  
3:3 Of whom let it not be the outward act of braiding of hairs, and of putting gold around, or of clothing, the adorning of garments, 
3:4 but the hidden man of the heart, in the incorruptible adornment of the meek and quiet spirit, which is of great value before God.  
3:5 For so once indeed the holy women who were hoping on God adorned themselves, submitting themselves to their own husbands, 
3:6 as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord; whose children you became, doing good, and fearing no terror.
An example of Sarah’s submission to Abraham is found in Genesis 12 and again in Genesis 20.
Abraham became fearful for his own life when he realized how attractive his wife, Sarah, was (Gen.12:11-12).  

To keep the Egyptian men from killing him in order to have her, Abraham asked Sarah to say to them that she was his sister.  Sarah obeyed Abraham and, in fact, was even taken into Pharaoh’s harem.
Genesis 12:11 And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou art a fair woman to look upon
Gen. 12:12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This is his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.  
Gen. 12:13 Say, I pray thee, thou art my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee. 
Gen. 12:14 And it came to pass that when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she was  very fair. 
Gen. 12:15 The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into  Pharaoh's house.
Gen. 12:16 And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he donkeys, and menservants, and maidservants, and she donkeys, and camels.
Gen. 12:17 And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram's wife.
Gen. 12:18 And Pharaoh called Abram, and said, What is this that thou hast done unto me?
Gen. 12:19 why didst thou not tell me that she was thy wife?  Why saidst thou, She is my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take her, and go thy way.
Gen. 12:20 And Pharaoh commanded his men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
Or again in  Genesis Chapter 20:
Genesis 20:1  And Abraham journeyed from thence toward  the south country, and dwelled between  Kadesh and Shur, and sojourned in Gerar. 
Gen. 20:2 And Abraham said of Sarah his wife, She is my sister: and Abimelech king of Gerar sent, and                       took Sarah.
Gen. 20:3 But God came to Abimelech in a dream by night, and said to him, Behold, thou art but a dead man, for the woman which thou hast taken; for she is a man's wife.
Gen. 20:4 But Abimelech had not come near her: and he said, Lord, wilt thou slay also a righteous nation?
Gen. 20:5 Said he not unto me, She is my sister? and she, even she herself said, He is my brother: in the integrity of my heart and innocency of my hands have I done this. 

Gen 20:6 And God said unto him in the dream, Yea, I know that in the integrity of thy heart thou hast done this, and I also withheld thee from sinning against Me; therefore suffered I thee not to touch her.
Gen 20:7 Now therefore, restore the mans wife…….
Even when men took away Sarah to be theirs, she remained faithful to follow the direction of her husband and the Lord and she did not tell that she was his wife.  She had faith in her husband and the Lord to be in control of the situation no matter what it looked like. 
How many wives today when put in situations to submit to your husbands, truly do so?    
What does the principle of headship mean then to the Christian woman?  Does the principle still apply even if the husband requests his wife to go against her personal convictions from God?  
I’ve heard women say, “Of course we’re to be subject to our husbands as long as it doesn’t conflict with the things of God.” 

Others might say, “Submit to him, but not in every little thing, just the important things and not if what he tells you is wrong.”  But GOD says “in everything, as unto the Lord.”

If a wife is submissive to her husband only when she thinks that he is not asking her to sin, then does she not become his judge and even the leader of their family?   
Would it not be a terrible burden if wives were required to think about and consider each and every one of their husbands words and decisions to determine whether or not they will follow them? 

Sarah’s case was an extreme one, for sure, but God used it to illustrate in His Word what the husband and wife relationship should be.  
Let me repeat, it was GOD (not man) who used it to illustrate in His Word what the husband and wife relationship should be.  

Of all the examples and illustrations that God could have used, He chose the example of Abraham and Sarah in 
1 Peter 3 !! 

Remember the context of 1 Peter 3, which actually goes back into chapter 2, is the husband and wife relationship, particularly zeroing in on a wife’s submission to her husband.  
Verse one of chapter 3 is not just referring to a non-believer as is commonly taught.  “In like manner, you wives, be in subjection to your own husbands that even if any obey not the word, they may without the word be gained by the behavior of their wives……” 

From the context, this is referring to Abraham!  In Gen. 12 & 20, Abraham did not obey the word.  He deceived the Egyptians and Abimelech.  He lied to them concerning his marital status and asked his wife to do the same.  
Do you or I “obey not the word” at times. Of course.  You and I and any honest believer must say that we too, at times, “obey not the word.”  From the context, we can easily see that verse 1 of 1 Peter 3 is not referring to an unbeliever.  

It’s referring to Abraham
“In like manner you wives (Sarah) be in subjection to your own husbands (Abraham); that even if any obey not the word (Abraham) they (Abraham) may without the word be gained by the behavior of their wives (Sarah); beholding your 
(Sarah) chaste behavior coupled with fear….”

“For after this manner aforetime, the holy women (Sarah) who hoped in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own husbands (Abraham), as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose children  you are, if you do well (obey your husband in everything – Gen. 12 & 20) and are not put in fear by any terror.”  
Was Abraham “gained without the word” by Sarah’s obedience?  Absolutely!  God delivered them both!
Ephesians 5:24 was given so that women would know that when the Word of God said wives were to be subject to their own husbands “in everything”, He meant “everything.”

Nowhere do the scriptures tell wives to disobey; defy; nullify the headship of their husbands.
And remember what we said.  Submission is not the end of the instruction.  1 Peter 3:5 tells about women who trusted God.  And this is the ingredient that will determine the difference between women and “holy women.”

Wives are not told to trust their own ability or judgment but to trust God. 
Because of Sarah’s obedience and trust, God delivered both of them (Gen. 12:17-20).  

God has told wives, each and all, to submit to their own husbands in everything.  Obedience to that command, prayer, and the leading of the Holy Spirit should keep the godly wife in perfect peace; just like Sarah in 1 Peter 3.
Satan's Ministers

And no marvel; for even Satan fashioneth himself into an angel of light.  It is no great thing therefore if his ministers also fashion themselves as ministers of righteousness  
2 Corinthians 10:14-15

In light of these truths, there are those in "positions of church leadership" who viciously teach and counsel women at conferences, seminars, and in their local congregations, to go against their husbands if they tell them not to attend their church service.  Or in fact, in other situations, there are “pastors” and so-called “teaching elders” that actually counsel wives that they are not to follow along with their husband if the husband decides to leave that particular church and to start fellowshipping with another!  

Some concrete examples in action are as follows:

How can a professing Christian wife turn against her husband and his leadership and begin to follow someone else and forsake the marriage covenant?

The first example is from a Ladies Retreat that was organized by one of the local churches.  This is what was taught to all of the ladies in attendance by the visiting pastor from Michigan:  Quote:

“….A wife is to be subject to her husband only domestically; in things relating to the home

“You know….issues like paying the bills, where to go on vacation, what car to buy, whether to have a dog or not, taking out the garbage, etc., etc.  When the Bible speaks of submission to your husband, these are the kinds of things that a wife is to be subject to her husband; things that are only related to the domestic realm.” 

"Remember - there are three sphere’s of government:  Civil, domestic, and church.  And so, this is what you ladies should say to your husbands:  "You know hubby, there are three spheres of government.  There's the domestic sphere, the civil sphere, and the church sphere.  Only in terms of domestic issues, things that come under the domestic realm, I am to look to you for guidance and to come under your submission.  I am not to come under your guidance and submission in the civil or especially the church sphere.  That is beyond your scope of authority over me, hubby!"

And then he cites the passage regarding so-called civil disobedience (Acts 5:29 - Peter and the other apostles answered and said, "...We ought to obey God rather than men..."), or the scripture passage in Romans Chapter 13.

Dear friends, in authoritarian, abusive, local institutional religious systems, the “leaders” reveal their true colors over and over again when it comes to human relationships within the family, especially those of a husband and wife.   The scriptures are trampled upon over and over again by these religious strongmen and nobody bats an eye! 

A wife's submission to her husband only involves things like "taking out the garbage; what kind of car to buy; whether to have a dog or not; where to go on vacation; etc; issues that only come up in your domestic dwelling place?

You are dealing with poisonous snakes, no different from the one in the Garden of Eden who put a wedge between Eve and her husband Adam.

"Three sphere's of government?"  Where do you read that in the Bible?  It is NOWHERE in the Bible!

The scriptures enjoin us to be in subjection to the civil powers that be.
The scriptures enjoin us to be in subjection to your masters (employers?), both to the good and to the forward.  But these are never superceded by the marriage institution. 

You will never, EVER find scriptures telling wives to be in subjection unto their own government, or employer, or their town council or their “pastor”, AS UNTO THE LORD.
For the government, employer, town council, “pastor” is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, being himself the Savior of the body.
But as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives also be to their own government, employer, town council, and “pastor” in everything.
You will not find this perversion in the scriptures!  You will only find this perversion in the minds and mouths of perverted and poisonous "wicked shepherds."

But you will find the scriptures telling wives to be subject to their own HUSBANDS, AS UNTO THE LORD……IN EVERYTHING ! 

One more example is from another Women’s Retreat.  This is what the speaker said (a “Reformed” Pastor) at this gathering:

“God has given the husband no warrant to demand his wife’s submission to sin. 

(Ed. Note“sin” as defined by the elders, of course)  

The husband has no authority to demand that you violate the "authority of the church"

 (Ed. Note:  Hmmm.  I wonder who that might be?)

The husband has no authority to demand that you profane the Lord’s Day or to absent yourself from the public meetings of church.  (Oh really!) 

You must respectfully decline.  His  authority does not go that far.  Pity the woman who plays the coward, acquiesces, accommodates and tries to cover it up by claiming submission.  She’s deluded; she’s deceived – giving him precedent for his future demands.  She’s playing the fool; she’s a coward before the eyes of her children.  She’s accomplishing the opposite of what she says she’s doing.”

These are real examples of who and what we are dealing with.  As stated many times on this site, countless marriages and families are in total shambles as a result of these false teachings and practices. 

Can you apprehend the base and utterly despicable theological buffoonery that these spiritual monsters shamelessly advance?

Do you understand the servile mentality that is being exhibited by so-called “Christian wives” who have slavishly imbibed this trash, even to the point of being catapulted into an almost zombie-like condition, walking in circles repeating over and over again to their husbands, “my church and pastor come first in my life; NOT YOU!”

To sum up this section, we'll use one final example from a message (TE-22) given by a pastor named Albert N. Martin from the Trinity Baptist Church in Montville, NJ.

In this "sermon", he uses Ephesians Chapter 5 as his proof text, (…now get this…), for church members to submit to their pastors in the local assembly!!

It will be said by Mr. Martin that "the only Head of the Church is Jesus Christ Himself.  Anyone who would intrude or question that headship is blaspheming!"

Now that particular statement of course is true.  But the problem will arise when he now equates this marital passage in Ephesians 5……TO HIMSELF, attempting to prove that church members are to submit to HIM!   

This is what he says next.   "...Christ governs His church by His Word and Spirit by means of the rule of duly-appointed elders."  (By means of what?  See: The Eldership Cookbook)

He would go on to say, "So, the rule of Christ with reference to the local church is NOT expressed only by the subjection of every member to the Word of Christ......." 

Now listen carefully. Now comes the bait and switch.  Listen very carefully as the scriptures will be further twisted and then, re-invented.

He continues, "A third factor enters and there is absolutely no inconsistency between absolute subjection to Jesus Christ as the only Head of the church and immediate subjection of church members to their elders."  

He continues......."You have the same thing in regards to a husband & wife relationship.  The head of every true believer is Christ and Paul says wives be subject to husbands." 

"So there is no contradiction in this truth but a 'wonderful synthesis'."

Wait a minute!  Do you see the problem?  Among other things, he is now egregiously and flagrantly equating a wife's subjection and submission to her own husband with what a church member's "supposed" subjection and submission should be to...... "their elders!"  The same with a husband.  He is equating a husband's headship over his what an "elders" headship in the church over each and every member ought to be!

Do you see the issue?  Do you see the diabolical scheme and trap that is being set?  Do you see the deceiver trapping the deceived?   The marriage between a husband and wife is a picture of Christ and the Churchnot a picture of the church member to their elders!  Do you see the bait and switch?

Wives are nowhere told to submit to or obey their elders.  NOWHERE!  (See: Obey Them)

This particular poisonous snake knows that.  But he doesn't like that.  He wants the church member (i.e. wife and/or husband) to be subject to him "in everything" too!  He wants the church member to be subject to him "as unto the Lord" too!  He wants the church member to consider him as "head" and "ruler" over them too, just like as a husband is head and ruler over his family.  

This is a loathsome evil and practice that is occurring in many churches, with many individuals that are supposedly "exercising the oversight."  Insofar as this particular individual is concerned (Albert N. Martin) is it any wonder that many have been warned:

 “…..I feel that it is my duty to warn you that Albert N. Martin  will not hesitate to come between you and your wife in order to gain his own ends…..”

All of these examples is a manifestation of the "religious rot" that is out there, being pummeled again and again at churches, theological conferences and workshops, seminars, retreats, and as a result, many wives in particular have succumbed to this evil teaching and counsel and have ALREADY forsaken their own husbands in their hearts. 

Being taught to place the man-made institution, along with its man-made leadership above their family; being taught to place the man-made institution, along with its made-made leadership above their own husband and his wishes, has become the rule of the day.

But should we really blame these women who speak and behave this way?  Not totally.  Remember!  They are victims of a carnal-minded, out-of-control tyranny inside the institutionalized "Christian" church today, to  whom they have surrendered their souls to.

There is absolutely no difference whatsoever with what we see happening here, to what we have known of other cults.

Remember Waco, Texas years back, with their spiritual leader and pastor, David Koresh?  How about even further back in the jungles of Guyana with their spiritual leader and pastor the Rev. Jim Jones?  Just as obedience and loyalty to their church and pastor brought death and destruction to many, this same obedience and loyalty to their churches and pastors is bringing death and destruction to marriages and families all over the world today.

And it is for the exact same reason as it occurred in Waco and Guyana!  

And what are those reasons?  

"Church members" willingly giving up their minds and their souls at the institutional church doors; allowing themselves to be induced with the spiritual morphine of "institutional church rule," as they slowly imbibe its effects to the point that they think “The Pastor” and his words become the voice of God and he is to be obeyed to the same degree as you would obey God Himself!  This is why many (wives especially) mindlessly, without any shame or twinge of conscience, listen to, follow, and obey everything they are told to do within those institutional walls.

Even if it means destroying your own family "for the higher good," the higher good of course being in conformance to "the wishes of your pastor and the theological system of his local church."

"Take heed that ye be not deceived."  Luke 21:8
Back To The Beginning - In The Garden

“…Yea, hath God said…”
Genesis 3:1

Isn’t it the same situation back in the Garden of Eden?  There is Eve – all alone, away from her husband.  Now enters Satan, dangling the temptation before her eyes.  

“Hath God said……”  Eve begins to ponder and begins to see how attractive and how spiritual his words were.  Eve lusted after that beautiful tree and its fruit and even after the serpent himself as he stood there and spoke with her.  She thought of the serpent (and of her very own self as well) to be very spiritual in quoting God's own words. 
But Eve also thought that she could ignore God's other words to her concerning her role as a help meet, as being one flesh with her husband.  She thought that she could ignore her head and listen to her cunning, crafty counselor and advisor the serpent, and receive promotion from her advisor, the serpent, and still be in good standing with God. 
 “Ah”, she said, “my counselor and advisor, Mr. Serpent, knows the Word of God too!  He quotes it so nicely and so accurately.  And oh, he is so wise; even wiser than my husband Adam.  He seems to be more educated and closer to God too!”
"Hath God said, 'wives be in subjection to your own husbands in everything?'”  
So, along comes the “pastor,” the "elder," the "minister," the "wicked shepherd" that says:

“Ah, but 'in everything'………except spiritual matters; that means 'in everything'...d-o-m-e-s-t-i-c.  God has gifted ME with authority and you are to submit and listen to ME in these matters.  Obeying ME is like obeying God.  Don’t you know that I am clothed with spiritual authority given to me by Christ Himself!  Don’t listen to or follow your husband in this matter.  He has no authority over you!”
And so history repeats itself and the wife falls and succumbs to the temptation and the downward spiral of the marriage begins. 

A Christian wife has as much right to subject herself to her so-called "church leaders" over that of her husband, as the church has as much right to subject herself to the devil over that of Christ.

As has been said before, whenever a woman forsakes her husband to follow the spiritual advice or counsel of another, it will always lead to tragedy.

The scriptures say a woman must ignore her “feelings” about what she thinks God’s will is, and do what her husband says. 

Do not fall into the trap of the devil and his servants and start to find excuses or “a way out.”

“My husband isn’t really spiritual; He has a bad temper; He’s a bad example;  it's out of my husband's realm”, etc., etc.  

“Hmmm.  Nope.  Not that one.  I think that would be a sin, so I won't listen to him." 

Some wives even have the tenacity to actually ruffle through their bible in order to find verses to justify their rebellion:

A husband might say to his wife:  “This person is not a real friend to you.  Stay away from her.”

"Nope," says the wife.  "The Bible says forsake not your friends."

A husband might say to his wife:  "This church is going the way of Satan.  Do not go."

"Nope", says the wife.  "The Bible says forsake not the assembling and let your yea be yea."

A husband might say to his wife"The scriptures say THIS concerning an issue."

"Nope", says the wife.  "The Pastor told me this instead and the Bible says to obey them that have the rule over you."

There are many wives who use this as an excuse to “get their way” on any so-called “sticky issue.”  

What a despicable and disgraceful display of blaspheming the Lord and His Word to which these wives allegedly profess to believe.

If you already have your mind made up, or rather shall I say, if a "church leader" or "friend" has already made your mind up for you, twisting the Scriptures as to what GOD has supposedly said about the marriage relationship and headship, you are treading dangerous waters. 

Here is how God deals with that mindset: Ezekiel Chapter 14
Eze 14:1 Then came certain of the elders of Israel to me, and sat before me. 
Eze 14:2 And the word of the LORD came to me, saying, 
Eze 14:3 Son of man, these men have set up their idols in their heart 

(These men had come to God's priest Ezekiel to seek God's will. But they already had their minds made up as to what they were going to do. God calls this 'idols of the heart') 

and put the stumblingblock of their iniquity (self will) before their face: should I be inquired of at all by them? 
Eze 14:4 Therefore speak to them, and say to them, Thus says the Lord GOD; Every man of the house of Israel that sets up his idols in his heart, and puts the stumblingblock of his iniquity before his face, and cometh to the prophet; I the LORD will answer him that cometh according to the multitude of his idols; 
Eze 14:5 That I may take the house of Israel in their own heart, because they are all estranged from me through their idols. 
Eze 14:6 Therefore say unto the house of Israel, Thus says the Lord GOD; Repent, and turn yourselves from your idols; and turn away your faces from all your abominations. 
Eze 14:7 For every one of the house of Israel, or of the stranger that sojourns in Israel, which separates himself from me, and sets up his idols in his heart, and puts the stumblingblock of his iniquity before his face, and comes to a prophet to inquire of him concerning me; I the LORD will answer him by myself: 
But notice how God answers a person who comes to His word with their mind already made up:
Eze 14:8 And I will set my face against that man, and will make him a sign and a proverb, and I will cut him off from the midst of my people; and ye shall know that I am the LORD. 
Eze 14:9 And if the prophet be deceived when he hath spoken a thing, I the LORD have deceived that prophet, and I will stretch out my hand upon him, and will destroy him from the midst of my people Israel. 
If you have a "feeling" that what your husband is telling you is wrong or you say that “your  conscience” says its unbiblical and so therefore you “cannot go against your conscience”, or if your so-called “church elders" or "friends"  are telling you to go against your husband when the word of God says “…so let the wives be subject to their own husbands in everything”THEN YOU ARE LISTENING TO AN EVIL SPIRIT FROM THE LORD!
If you put this feeling or conscience or false teachings of others' ahead of God's word, then He will answer you "according to the multitude of your idols of your heart."  

And the downward spiral will begin.  Your argument is not with anyone but God.
Women are to be subject to their husbands in EVERYTHING (Ephesians 5:24).

Remember again back in the Garden?  Eve saw no need to go to Adam before she ate of the tree.  And why is it that she saw no need to confer or defer to her husband?  

Why was that?  

What prevented her from following and listening to her husband?  
It was because she “listened” to the “advice” of another; she heeded the “counsel” of another; she listened to the “voice” of another who was telling her not to follow God and her husband but to follow him!   

And so she subjected herself to the whims of another who came to her with scriptures too!  
Eve was being taught that to be a "help meet" did not necessitate having her husband actively involved in her decision making process.  Why, how very humiliating, having to involve her husband!

When our understanding comes from anything other than "Thy Word," it is really coming from nothing less than the serpent himself, disguising himself as a servant of righteousness.
How humiliating it would have been to Eve to have told “her counselor” that she preferred that her husband do the speaking.  And as so often the case……as then, so now.

A Christian wife has as much right in picking and choosing whether to be subject to her husband IN EVERYTHING as the church has as much right in picking and choosing whether to be subject to Christ IN EVERYTHING.
John 7:17    If anyone desires to do His will, he shall know concerning the teaching, whether it be of God, or whether I speak of Myself.
And what is HIS will?  

“But even as the church is subject to Christ, so also let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.” Ephesians 5:24
Christ And The Church

“But I speak concerning Christ and the church.”
Ephesians 5:32

Does the Church lose Her dignity when she submits to Christ in everything?  Does it detract from Her beauty, Her honor, Her "churchness" to give Herself wholly to Him?" 

Of course not.  Indeed, is it not exactly this that makes the Church a beautiful Bride?  It is! 

Is there any area in which the Church is not subject to Jesus Christ? 

It's not true that the Church says, "In matters of doctrine we will submit to Jesus, but in matters of practice, we will do our own thing." 
It's not true that the Church may say, "At certain times we will submit to Jesus, but at other times, we are free." 

No. In all things and all ways the Church is subject to Christ.  

It's a beautiful woman who places herself under the headship of her husband ALONE and submits to him in everything: willingly and from the heart.  As another has said, 

“My relationship to my husband is my relationship to the Lord!  If you willingly and joyfully obey the scriptures in this, you will find a joy (or healing) in your marriage you never dreamed possible.  When we align our lives with the Word, this can happen and be such a profound blessing.”  
A wife is to be subject to her husband in everything because God said so; and if you don’t, you are disobeying God.  
A woman who is obeying her Lord by submitting to her own husband in everything will receive favor with the Lord.  You cannot see the fabric God is weaving - you see only a few threads.  You do not know what God has planned or how He will perform the weaving. 
All you know is that God has His perfect plan, and the wife’s submission to her husband in everything is part of God’s way of revealing this plan.  His is a beautiful plan and a glorious privilege for wives personally - once they understand it.  
God wills that the wife be subject to her husband in everything to enable him to nourish and cherish her.  Such a relationship is in accordance with God’s perfect will - the visible picture of Christ’s invisible relationship to His Church (Eph. 5:22-31).  
As one has said, “I know that by submitting to my husband in everything, I know that with God, in Christ, my marriage relationship can only grow one way - toward being more perfect."
This type of marriage, formed in accordance to God’s plan, is just as much a part of making Christ known to the world as is witnessing verbally.  It’s the wife’s own private mission field.  With this marvelous privilege in mind, there is no more resentment, no more rebellion, no more phoniness, no more deception, - only joy.  This Godly wife is free - gloriously free to submit to her husband in everything so that Christ’s eternal love to His own Bride, the Church, may be shown to the world.
What came first to women was God's command to submit to their own husbands.  
AND THIS CAN BE DONE…..The principle is this: total and absolute and unconditional obedience should be rendered unto our Lord.  He demands nothing less than this.  You can indeed, and must follow your husband’s leadership and be subject in everything if you are willing to wait on God. 
Be patient and submit to your husband.  Realize that "this life is but a vapor which appears for a moment and then passes away."  Turn off the voices of your self-serving, sanctimonious leaders and take on the mind of Christ which says "not my will but what thou wilt."
And His will is for you to be subject to your own husband in everything.  Do this and you will stand before thousands and sing for joy. 
Refusing to do so, either willingly or unwillingly, will result in confusion and turmoil and every vile deed.
A Call To Repent

"For some are already turned aside after Satan." 
1st Timothy 5:15 

Some are already turned aside after Satan?  What group of people might this scripture be referring to?  

To find out what group has turned aside after Satan, you simply need to read 1st Timothy 5:14... 

"I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully."

The Apostle Paul makes it clear who the guilty group is, i.e., those who have TURNED ASIDE AFTER SATAN.  It is women who FAIL to fulfill God's ROLE for their life as mothers and wives.  

You value “your church attendance and your friends,” more than you do the family.  You care more about fulfilling the man-made requirements of a religious system than you do about your husband; your home; your children.
Instead of obeying their husbands (Ephesians 5:24), and conducting themselves as the scriptures declare, women have allowed the so-called church leaders to brainwash them into becoming independent; irresponsible; stubborn; rebellious and caused them to turn their backs on their families and husband and focus their attention on the pastor and his man-made institution!  

They are walking according to the course of this world, and the prince of it, by whom they were led captive at his will; for so is every wife that forsakes the counsel and direction of their husbands and follows instead their false teachers and their doctrines.  They have turned aside after Satan and the apostle knew this to be fact from his own observation.

It should not surprise you that God would refer to such women as having TURNED ASIDE AFTER SATAN.  Remember that Eve turned aside after Satan, by TAKING BAD ADVICE.  And as usual, history repeats itself as Satan’s ministers have caused many women to be drawn away from their husbands and the Truth.

We need to heed the admonition of the apostle Paul:  "Neither give place to the Devil" (Ephesians 4:27).

There are “Christian” women today who would be very quick to jump on the bandwagon and cry against the feminists and their entire ilk, yet the next day, these same “Christian” women would then turn around and act just like them!  

Some of them even being WORSE!  

If you are continually giving your husband grief and hurt, embarrassing him, abandoning him, hiding things from him,  lying to him, gossiping and slandering him; then you are a feminist.  You are turned aside after Satan.  

The feminist does her husband evil; BUT, the godly woman does her husband good.

"Rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft..." 1st Samuel 15:23.  The church and the home has become a place where Christian wives will only obey their husbands when they feel like it.  They're Christian, but only up to a point.  

Marriage is more like a game to many church women today, where you can quit the game anytime it's not going your way.  This is not Biblical Christianity.  But should this be surprising?

In Genesis 3:16, it says: Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.

This verse, as it is translated into the King James English, hides the great truth that is so obvious to the most casual observer.  It hides the fact that just as mankind in general naturally resent the headship of Christ, women just naturally resent the headship of a husband

The Hebrew word translated "to" in "thy desire shall be to thy husband..." is the Hebrew word "el," and is translated 151 times "against" - as it appears in the very next chapter in this verse:

Genesis 4:8  And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him. 

There is NO wife that will naturally seek to please her husband, any more than any man just naturally seeks to please his spiritual husband, Christ. The Truth be told, all men just naturally resent and resist the will of their heavenly, spiritual husband, and all wives just naturally resent and resist the will of their husbands.

This is the sad state of affairs and only Grace can correct the problem.  

If you, as a “professing Christian wife,” find yourself continually rebelling against your husband and his leadership, you need to seriously look in the mirror.  As was said at the beginning, for some women, truly accepting and following this one Bible teaching may very well be the ultimate test of their professed Christian faith in God.

Is it genuine, or is it a total sham!

True biblical subjection is a woman’s creative and challenging pleasure in discovering how she can show her husband that she respects him, admires him, and depends on him.  It means that you will become more interested in your husband’s needs than in your own. 

It means that you will stop asking, “How far must I go in my subjection to my husband?”  

This will require the death of all pride and the destruction of all self-centered, selfish motives.  This will necessitate shedding a lot of the "idols of the heart" (Ezekiel 14:1-9) of which, very few are capable of this painful process.

The Church is not subject to Christ because She is forced against Her will, but is such because of the wonderful grace of Jesus to change Her from a self-centered, sin-loving rebel into a beautiful Wife.  

You need to cry out to God, who alone is the One who can break your stubborn will and grant to you repentance.
As Sheep For The Slaughter

For this people's heart is waxed gross, and their ears are dull of hearing, and their eyes they have closed.
Matthew 13:15

A strange phenomenon has been manifesting itself for the last 50 -100 years; a phenomenon that is wounding many Christian men and women.  Are there any "Bereans" among us?  Sadly, the answer is no.  

These Christian men and women are being victimized and terrorized by a godless “church agenda" sinfully working within its’ system that will:

#1  roast a husband over the flames of Hell for exercising his headship in the home by daring to teach his wife and family something that goes against what the pastor teaches and: 

 #2  roast a wife over the flames of Hell for refusing to see things the same way that the Pastor does. 

Marriages are being destroyed by "church leaders" because one spouse has begun to "step on the pastor's toes." 

This is how the silencing of the lambs into submission is accomplished.

There are a lot of Christian couples in many of these churches today who cannot even begin to realize that they are nothing more than cattle headed for the slaughterhouse when they get married.  They will quickly learn and conform to this UNBIBLICAL injunction: 

".....As the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives and husbands, and all church members, be subject 
to their own spiritual overseers in everything....."  

Does anyone really imagine that God sees these "churches" as His representative on earth?

Just as pompous, arrogant government gorges itself on citizens, these pompous and arrogant “church leaders” gorge themselves and continue to gorge themselves on a never-ending supply of sheep.  Astonishingly these are sheep who have a choice and yet still willingly serve themselves up as the main course and allow their marriage to be invaded and overthrown by these spiritual monsters

There are many false shepherds that actually delight in gorging husband/wife relationships.  This is their favorite delicacy and they have access to an abundance of it without any cost whatsoever.  It is supplied without question or resistance.  In fact, the sheep even line up willingly to be devoured, even when they see their fellow sheep, along with their marriages being destroyed by these wolves! 

Pigs in a slaughterhouse, on the other hand, have far more “sense.”  At least, they squeal and struggle when they see their comrades being destroyed in front of their very eyes.  They at least know instinctively that there is a huge problem going on and they would certainly get out of there if they could.  But of course they can’t escape.  They are trapped. 

In today’s local institutional church, many Christian spouses, for the most part, are not so “smart.”  

They can run away and yet they don’t.  And even when the average professing Christian husband and/or wife sees other marriages being trampled on and destroyed by the giant meat grinder of “pastoral control,” these onlookers still remain in the problem at least long enough to eventually become the main course themselves! 

They fail to use the greatest means at their disposal to make their escape

the Bible’s clear teachings about the sacredness of the marriage relationship; about the duty and responsibility of a Christian to avoid deception and their full authorization from God to leave bad churches (See Eph 4: 14-15, Rom 16: 17-18, 2Thess 3:14-15, etc.).  But instead, they choose to believe a lie and reason with themselves that this is God’s plan to be mistreated, corralled and imprisoned.  

This satanic brainwashing and buffoonery has deceived, and IS deceiving millions of unknowing, often unthinking people into actually believing that:

- That “going to Church” is the highest form of worship and is commanded by God

- That all of your spiritual leaders are clothed with divine authority

- And that when it comes to a marital issue, a wife is to listen to and follow her pastor’s counsel, rather than her own husband!

Indeed, the wolves have been placed in charge of the sheep pen and are doing their best to keep you ignorant of the slaughter of Truth that is going on.   

All it took was one malicious, little, snake to destroy Eve's life, ruin her future happiness and hurt her marriage.  Eve made the mistake of LISTENING TO PEOPLE.

Don't let these poisonous snakes talk you into not following your husband and his leadership. 

May God Himself grant unto you eyes to see and ears to hear "the voice of the True Shepherd" and may you find the faith and courage to follow your husband and to do what God has designed for you to do, because doing it will bring you the peace, joy, and yes, the true freedom that Jesus died to provide.

Ken Cascio

See also: 

1)   A Woman After God's Own Heart                           
2)  When Clergy Prey
Wicked Shepherds Wolf
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